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By the way, do you sometimes get stuck in online conversations? Very frustrating


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Men are from Mars, women are from Venus.

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AskMen may get paid if you click a link in this article and buy a product or service. With proper testing and Tinder profile optimization, getting Tinder matches is easy. However, many men still struggle with how to talk to girls on Tinder. Building a great profile is just half the battle, because a match is virtually useless unless it le to a conversation. Once you get the matches flowing, and want to step up your messaging game, read on…. The truth is that by and large, a girl is not going to message you first.

If you want to talk to her, you're going to have to make the first move on Tinder.

How to actually chat up a woman, according to two women

Since girls are flooded with messages every single day, you need to send a message that stands out. A message that grabs her attention and piques her curiosity. He uses a unique opener, builds rapport by asking questions about his match, and moves the conversation off Tinder in the first exchange, with a date lined up! He keeps the conversation focused on her, asking genuine questions, which gets her to open up about her dog.

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He also mentions that he is meeting up with friends later that night. Great move to showcase his social life, and also puts a deadline on the current conversation. Scarcity can be a good thing! It means you're direct and shows you're interested.

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He first mentions where he lives, then casually asks if that is close by. When she says it is close to her, he immediately suggests they get together for a drink.

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It re-affirms that he has a social life, and more importantly, it lets her know that the date will not drag on all night. After working out the timing logistics, the girl suggests the place. This is great because it will be somewhere she is comfortable. Travis gets the without ever having to ask, and the pair of them swipe happily ever after.

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The first thing I notice is that the girl actually messaged Adam first. Adam sent a string of three messages, which is generally a bad idea. It might come off as desperate, and that drastically reduces your chances to get the date. He mentions where how to chat to girls lives, then asks where she lives.

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Yet again, Adam shoots himself in the foot. This was far too how to chat to girls, before any rapport or trust is created. By this point, Adam has lost her.

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He would have been much better off asking some basic questions to get to know her, then suggesting they meet up near her part of town. She brushed it off with a casual apology, and again Adam comes on too strong, sending his phone and suggesting again that they get together for a drink.

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So long as you're not rude, a Tinder conversation that doesn't work out is nothing to be ashamed of — and should be viewed as a learning opportunity. To find out more, please read our complete terms of use.

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