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My husband and I went out to a mini swingers social in the city the other night. It was organised by a couple who we met some time ago from RedHotPie and had hoped to catch up with again. This drinks night was a great idea!
One of the greatest dilemmas of couples tackling the idea of swinging is communication with others. Who should approach other swingers?
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Is there any lifestyle etiquette you should abide by? Here is how to manage communication with other swingers in the best possible way. Most newbie swingers get into the lifestyle by ing up to a swinging website. These sites are just like traditional dating sites, but for couples.
Once your new swinging connection has passed your screening questionsand you are confident that there is a real couple at the other end, the ladies in.
In fact, from this stage on, it is much more common to let the ladies chat and establish important details, such as a first video chat or in-person date. Ladies can be a little more in tune to comfort zones and making sure this happens.
Dirty texting phone chat
It is common to exchange phone s before going on a date. While there is no rule, it is once again more common for the ladies to swap s and have a first chat over the phone. Alternatively, you could engage in a group call so that you can all talk to each other and make the first connection. Many couples like to do a phone call sooner than later so they can voice verify that there is a real couple and not just a single person pretending to be a couple so they can cause trouble.
Managing swinger communications
This helps to minimize any chance of accidental jealous feelings or misunderstandings among newer swinger. Assuming they are comfortable without checking could be considered rude. When in doubt, ask via a group text orso everyone is equally informed and has the chance to voice their feeling. There are many free and cheap options available.
You can also buy a prepaid mobile phone aka burner phone, to completely separate your swinging life from your vanilla world. Most of your swinger communication is going to be via text.
People especially younger swingers tend to prefer texts over phone calls. Many swingers like to use separate apps like secure swinger communication for texting with their swinger friends to help protect privacy. Many of the virtual phone services, including Google Voice, allow texting as well.
Be careful with the archive settings of whatever text program you use. If you have kids that like to play on your phone or nosy friends, you might want to regularly delete your older text messages or place them behind a password.
If you exchange pictures via text especially naughty picturesbe careful where they are stored on your phone. If you use just one photo gallery for your vanilla family pictures and your swinging pictures, you might accidentally out yourself when trying to show vanilla pictures but swiping too far and displaying swinging pictures.
It is best to delete naughty pictures or store them in a password protected area. Wondering what to say or not say when meeting swingers in real life? Start with greetings, a handshake or a friendly hug is enough for the first time.
Swingers tend to enjoy knowing who they are taking to bed, so flirting between swingers and building a connection is essential. Start with easy topics before getting into anything swinging and sex-related. Move on to slightly more personal yet still soft questions. For instance, you can ask them how they met or how they got into swinging. If the conversation is going well and you like each other, you can start asking more hardcore questions.
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A good way to move the conversation that way is by asking phone chat with swingers swinging clubs they enjoy. This could be a clear indicator of their swinging style.
While managing communication is quite simple, there are things to avoid and other things to pay attention to. Online Communication Most newbie swingers get into the lifestyle by ing up to a swinging website.
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Phone Calls It is common to exchange phone s before going on a date. Texting Most of your swinger communication is going to be via text. In-Person Chatting Wondering what to say or not say when meeting swingers in real life?
What to Avoid While managing communication is quite simple, there are things to avoid and other things to pay attention to. Keep things light and entertaining avoiding topics such as money, politicsor religion.
Talking about sports, weather, traveling, or hobbies is a much better idea. In this lifestyle, everyone enjoys discretion. Your new friends might not be so eager to share things from their private lives with you.
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Avoid asking about their jobs, the school they attended, or whether they have. Also, pay attention if they name phone chat with swingers swingers and the amount of detail they reveal.
If they talk about other people in front of you, they will also talk about you in front of the others. Depending on how discreet you like phone chat with swingers be, this could be a deal-breaker. Remember… Getting into swinging can be amazing, but this lifestyle comes with a few unwritten rules.
Managing communication with other swingers may require more diplomacy and discretion than communicating with your partner or vanilla friends. Nevertheless, we hope the guidelines above will help you have a smooth entry into this world.